3 Ways to Start a Difficult Conversation with Your Partner

1/ Request time to speak about important issues, not just laying them on your partner spontaneously.

Remember timing can be everything. If you have an issue with your partner, instead of an offhand comment where you say what you are thinking or feeling when they are ready to start their workout or trying to complete a project – ask them for a minute to talk.  “I have a concern that I want to run by you – is this an ok time?”  Your partner will be more receptive when they don’t feel blindsided.

 2/ Softened start-up

When you start the communication pay attention to your tone and language. A request can be mis-interpreted as a demand when the tone and delivery are harsh.

 3/ Make requests instead of complaints,  criticism or blame

            Identify your intention and what you would like to see happen going forward.  “It would be really helpful if you could let me know when you need quiet for a business meeting you have to do on zoom today.” Starting out by identifying a negative behavior can derail the communication and send it to a power struggle of opposing viewpoints and defensiveness.